Thursday, June 12, 2008

It Starts Here . . .



I remember once having a visit with a friend and her two-year-old who was very busy. He decided he was going to take a drink -- he must have been just learning how to use a cup -- but he chose to take one from my glass, and from each of the adults around the living room. His mom put up a protest, but without any follow-through, there was nothing stopping him.

I looked at my own son, still a tiny baby, and vowed he would never get away with that kind of bad manners. He grew up to be every bit as busy as that little boy, and training was a struggle every step of the way. But I've learned that manners start in the high chair.

My one-year-old daughter illustrated this point last night by grabbing my napkin. It seemed innocent enough -- even my husband protested when I took it back. But I pointed out that this is the battle ground when the war for good manners begins. If I don't teach my babies (who are still reasonably compliant) to respect the property of others, how will my toddlers (who are usually not so compliant) know?

Then the other baby, just this morning, spit out her yogurt. Again, cute, but not cool when she's older! We've been teaching our babies sign language so instead of putting up a fuss or spitting out their food, they can say "All done" in an appropriate way. Of course, that's not to say they always do it, and that's where correction comes in. I'm sure you have your methods. Turning the high chair around worked well for my older daughter.

It's never an easy road, but I'm determined that I'm going to raise kids who are respectful of others. There are far too many older kids and adults who were never taught these basic skills.

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